Things You'll Never Hear A CZ Brat Say


1. What's the big deal about a "ditch"?

2. I hate rain, thunder and Lightning...

3. Will Winter NEVER get here? All this sun and heat gets old!

4. Isn't there somewhere ELSE to go than the Beach?

5. ANOTHER Fish Fry?

6. Oh yuck, Ceviche...

7. Meat-on-the Stick? I'd rather have a Corn Dog!

8. I prefer Apples and Peaches over Mangoes and Ginups any day.

8. Rice? Give me mashed potatoes please.

9. French Fries with Gravy -- gross!!

10. Do we have to go to Spaghetti Night again?

11. Ginups? -- never heard of them.

12. Oh, we'll have enough beer.

13. Man, Chagres water sucks! Give me L.A. water anytime!

14. Paddle a boat coast-to-coast? You sober?

15. No, thanks, my mother doesn't like me to _____________ .

16. No one could be THAT corrupt.

17. You'd have to be an idiot to ride your bike down THOSE stairs.

18. Is this stuff safe to eat?

19. Oh, the local beef is just as good.

20. What's the weather forecast for tomorrow?

21. Anything good on TV tonight?

22. Is that a legal copy?

23. What's Johnny Mazetti?

24. Aren't you going to wash that mango before you eat it?

25. Yacht club? I don't know...I'm not into that "society" stuff.

26. Golf club? I don't know...I'm not into that "society" stuff.

27. The Ancon Inn? Sounds quaint. How's the food?

28. I prefer my beer in a glass, please.

29. Think she will?

30. Shouldn't be any problem to find a _________ in Panama City.

31. I only drink Puerto Rican rum.

32. Sure, I'd vote for Carter. He did a lot of good.

33, What KIND of "meat on a stick?"

34. I don't worry about the local cops...I'm an American.

35. WHY should I honk at the overpass?

36. I know a shortcut through the Casco Viejo.

37. You know, people from the Other Side are really all right!

38. I love the Trans-Isthmian Highway!

39. Empanadas? Yuck! I can't stand them.

40. But won't we get wet?

41. Contractor's Hill? Where's that? Geez, why would anyone wanna go there?

42. But the legal age for _________ is ___ ! Won't we get in trouble?

43. Hey! Everyone! WAKE UP! The sun's coming up over the PACIFIC!

44. I'd like to be the first to ride the train when it's running.

45. I can't believe you'd hire domestic help!

46. Push what button?

47. Would you really join the Elks/VFW/American Legion just to buy booze?

48. I didn't bring a bathing suit.

49. What Reunion?

50. Where can I get a good deal on a lawnmower?

51. Oh, I parked under that breadfruit tree; it's cooler there.

52. What's the "B" stand for on that hill?

53. Why are all these people parked on the Causeway? It's too dark to see anything.

54. I don't know...what's IN a Cuba Libre?

55. What's the best place to go swimming?

56. What's so hard about following politics in Panama?

57. C'mon, no one would ever get upset over...

58. Don't worry, the Canal will last forever. The Americans were just maintenance-crazy.

59. No way--you didn't make THAT in shop class!

60. No way--you didn't make THAT at work!

61. I'm not worried about the tuli vieja. Sure, I'll spend the night there--alone. It's just a stupid superstition!

62. Heck, you'll never get that out of the country.

63. Yeah? What's a pink belly?

64. THE HILL'S ON FIRE!!! THE HILL'S ON FIRE!! CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!!

65. What the hell is a cayuco?

66. Oh, you don't have to lock that ______, nobody'll mess with it.

67. We're out of ______? I'll just pop over to the 7/11 and get some more.

68. Where the heck is the Panama Canal?

69. Contractor's Hill? Who wants to drive that far to have a beer party?

70. I don't want to go skinny dipping in Cocoli Lake.

71. Let's stay home. The Yacht Club is too rowdy.

72. Roll garbage cans down the hill? It'll wake up the whole town.

73. Who would want to go to Kimbos? It's too dark.

74. I step on that plaque all the time.

75. I'd never take a water pistol into the high school.

76. I like potato chips better than plantain chips.

77. Who wants to ride a train to the other side to see a silly football game?

78. Wait a sec while I get my umbrella.

79. Do you have any rum?

80. Whats a pipa?

81. You mean you drink coconut milk?

82. I've never eaten monkey meat.

83. I don't feel like drinking.

84. I’ll put my shoes on before I go out and play.

85. I'll be ready as soon as I iron a shirt.

86. I've had too much...why don't we take a cab home?

87. I’ll be home right after the game.

88. I hate the feel of the warm earth ooseing between my toes.

89. Oh, look a shark net...how safe, no sharks can get through!

90. I hate getting the Sears catalog in the mail.

91. YEA!!!!!! What if the weather is lousy, good fishing anyway.

92. I always go 40 on the Cocoli Straightway!

93. I always go 40 on the Gamboa Straightway!

94. Throw an egg instead of toss it at the Elks Picnic? Not me....

95. There's the Detective Ransom.........lets go over and say hi!!!

96. We don't drink until we get to Santa Clara...agreed????

97. Where's the Blue Goose?

98. I don't believe in sex before getting married.

99. I don't believe in sex outside the marriage.

100. Take this Christmas tree out to the garbage please.

101. I can't dance that Lucho music.

102. Don't be chincey pay the guy what he's asking for that hat....

103. That’s the last beer? Go ahead and take it!!

104. I can't eat that Napoli pizza! There's these little burnt spots on it!!

105. Thats filete on them there meat on the sticks!!!

106. Go to the Rancho? Nah its dangerous down there!!!

107. Eat a monkey plum??? You gotta be crazy, Those things are full of worms!!!

108. Man I think I'm getting too much sun.....

109. Wow,  I think I'm getting too much DDT!!!

110. 'ey mon, I think you bought too much beer!!!

111. I can't eat that mango -- it's too green!!!!

112. There's no mix....so lets wait until we get some....for this rum....

113. Not me!! I'm not going down the slide!!!!

114. No sargento....you can't have a beer.....

115. Lets organize this trip right!!!

116. Lets go have a quiet drink somewhere......like the Drive-In!!!!

117. Carta Vieja, Ron Cortez??? Whats the difference??

118. I like Malta Vigor!!!

119. I'm hungover and hungry lets see.....Mondongo or Sancocho...hmmm....hard choice!!!

120. Here comes the rain! Lets finish this game tomorrow.....

121. Ouch!!! Stickers!!!!

122. Hey don't try to beat that train!!!!

123. Lets go over to Curundu and kick some *ss!!!!!

124. Don't pass that hamburger over the railing....thats stealing!!!!

125. What’s that strange smelling stuff they're smoking???

126. Three beers!! That’s my limit!!!

127. Whatdya mean drink that coconut? I don't know how to use a machete!!!

128. Let’s walk around the long way...I'm afraid of that jungle....

129. Hey there's a dead bat!! Pick it up!!!

130. Hey guys..I'm headed for bed...got church in the morning....

131. I'll kick Coach Brown's butt!!!!

132. I swam from Boy Scout Island to Flamenco Island!!!!

133. Hey Sargent Alvis!! Screw YOU!!!!!

134. Hey Sheriff Marchuck!! Screw you too!!!!

135. Hey Mr. Clark!! Up your *ss with polished brass!!!!

136. This is the pub...and Dave Furlong manages it...so lets respect the place!!!!

137. I really did see a submarine while parked out on the Causeway.

138. Who was Goethals?

139. I thought a mule was a donkey!

140. I didn't know "mola" was an art form, I thought is was spanish for mole!

141. I thought Panama Red was pot, turns out it was Bill Bright!

142. What's the 69 on that hill stand for?

143. Where is the Napoli?

144, What is Wiki Juice?

145. I'm NOT leaving the house without my shoes!

146. No shoes, no shirt, no service.

147. I LOVE snow!

148. No sancocho, please--just give me some soup.

149. You can't be serious--there's no way I'm going shark fishing!

150. Cerveza Panama is p-ss water!

151, Let's stay home tonight and watch TV.

152, Pardon me; where could one find a decent quiche in town?

153, Isn't this the weekend we set our clocks back?

154. What's the best place for concerts?

155. Man, I could eat clubhouse food every day of the year!

156. Why would you want to stop at the Halfway House?

157. What does BYC stand for?

158. I prefer to walk in Panama City, sometimes at 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning -- especially when I just want to be alone.

159. I never pay anyone off; I just fill out the forms and do it the "right" way.

160. BYC stands for Brigham Young College. I think.

161. Cocoli Lake is too muddy to swim in. I'd never get my bathing suit white again.

162.I liked the Napoli better before it was air-conditioned.

163. Tearing down the Tivoli was a brilliant decision!

164. Those little red peppers are so cute! Are they good?

165, I wish they sold Blue Star ice cream ("helado Estrella Azul") here in the States.

166. Can I have a Cafe Duran--decaf?

167. Mom, I swear, I won't leave the teen club.

169. What's "blue ointment"?

170. When asked how long it takes to drive across the Isthmus, he'd never say: "You mean, without stopping?"

171. When asked how long it takes to drive to the beach, he'd never say: "You mean, without stopping?"

172. When asked how long it takes to get to work, he'd never say: "____ minutes!"

173. When asked how long it takes to drive to the Yacht Club, he'd never say: "I don't know"

174. I grew up in the Panama Canal Zone. And I don't want to talk about it.

175. Hey, these are M-80s! We need to give these back to the Army!

176. Should I pack a cooler?

177. Does anyone here play Spades?

178. Is there really a Christmas Tree Lane?

179. SCN really rocks!

180. Wow--they buttered my cheeseburger!

181. Put a Navy dye marker in the pool? Why?

182. How much do these green wool blankets cost?

183. WHY do they call it the Corral?

184. Riots are so much fun!

185. Torrijos was good, but Noriega REALLY had his sh*t together.

186. Taking a three-month family vacation seems...I don't know...frivolous.

187. I'm positive Panama will develop and protect its tourism industry.

188. Look! There's a vacant house. Let's leave those nice plants & those one foot square stepping stone cement blocks for the next occupant.

189. Can someone please tell me how to get to Farmacia Arrocha?

190. Eat an iguana? What are you, nuts?

191. I would NEVER eat at a YMCA!

192. A chiva is a goat, right?

193. What's a bollo?

194. What's piba?

195. Aw, Mom! Not empanadas and cariminolas AGAIN!

196. Are huevitos Easter eggs?

197. No need to call housing. I can fix this.

198. We'll get lost in those tunnels on the Causeway. The MPs might catch us in there.

199. Those chemicals you bought in Arrocha's are dangerous;  I don't want to see you light them.

200. Malibu?  Isn't that in California?

201. May I get a ride with you to the drive in? I want to go to the library & study.

202. I don't eat feastburgers.

203. Let's be quiet in the library this time.

204.
The car got a flat (next to France Field exit or on the way to Margarita) so I just left it..it will be alright when I get back ... NOT!


Mail in your contribution!!


Presented by CZBrats
Last updated January
31, 2000
Copyright 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000 by CZ Brats

funr.gif (1654 bytes)MMr.gif (1718 bytes)